Saturday, 5 April 2008

Dear Russell T Davies

I'm a big fan of your work. I loved Queer As Folk. I adored Bob And Rose. I didn't really 'get' some of The Second Coming, but that's probably my fault. I have issues with concentration. I also enjoy your popular Doctor Who programme, although I can't remember the difference between any of the monsters unless someone shows me a picture. Apart from the Daleks, of course. And the Cybermen. And sometimes I find David Tennant a tiny bit annoying. But these are all trifles compared to one colossal problem I have. Who is dressing the doctor's assistants? And why do they hate them?

Let us firstly remember Rose, and her hugely unflattering collection of leisure gear – I'm thinking fleeces, parkas, hoodies, stonewashing… 

Piper, all of female kind shares your look of contempt. 

Let us next turn to Martha Jones (no relation, other than spiritually), and her hideous, omnipresent, boxy maroon pleather jacket, strangely reminiscent of a Russian sex worker.

I had high hopes for Donna and her black suits of power. Even though she looked like she was wearing what was known in the 80s as a 'body' underneath, which probably fastened with poppers in the undercarriage locality. At least she looked like she had a waist. Until she was off duty on Bernard Cribbins' allotment, wearing a shapeless long cardigan/knitted coat affair.

Finally, in tonight's denouement, we caught a glimpse of Rose Tyler – back, back, back, as they used to say in Smash Hits. Had her absence caused the head of wardrobe's heart to grow a little fonder, sartorially speaking? It had not. There was a jacket. It was pleather. The pleather was midnight blue. Let us once again allow the Piper's expression to relay the rest.


I know these are meant to be ordinary girls. But I am an ordinary girl and so are most of my friends. And we know better.

I just wanted to get that off my chest. Which is absolutely not clad in imitation animal skin.

Love you!

Miss Jones


Miss W said...

It the bit at the end, where Donna reveals she has all her bags packed and ready to go I did think, "Have they just written that whole bit in as an excuse to give her a bigger variety of nice clothes than the poor assistant usually gets?" But in the trailer for next week she appears to be wearing a maternity smock from 1977 - for a trip to ancient Rome. Whatever.

I do not miss Martha.

I heart Catherine Tate.

The Big Reveal of Rose at the end really got me. I literally went, 'Ooooh!'

Anonymous said...

Correct me if I'm wrong, but is Mr Davies not gay? And would that not explain his depiction of the ladies concerned?
I only ask because I wish to know.